In my last post, I revealed that I had set up a profile on an online dating site. That process along with understanding the site’s mechanisms was a little intimidating. For anyone that has not attempted this fate, let me enlighten you and hopefully eliminate some of your anxieties. First, you must have patience and an open mind – Remember people are utilizing these sites for a variety of reasons -in search of soul mates, companionship, friendships that lead to more, and quick hook ups. Second, proceed with caution. You may not find a “Mr. or Mrs. Right” or a companion right away, but you may find new platonic friends. Third, always stay true to yourself.
I am going to make the assumption that since the objective of these online dating sites are similar, the requests for information is also similar. So, the first step is to create a profile, a summary of how you would like to be interpreted by prospects. The phrase “Garbage in Garbage out” is applicable here. I found this to be an intimidating task because it was challenging for me to fit who I am and all of my likes into a couple of paragraphs, so, I did not. Consequently, you question if what you did emphasize is construed as relevant, corny, or even interesting. This is something that will eventually be answered by your responses. The goal is to present yourself in such a light to hopefully attract the type of people who share your interests.
What does a profile entail? Your profile encompasses information about you as a person, as well as, your physical aspects, i.e., color of your eyes, hair, and your body shape; general information about what you do for a living (accountant, engineer, etc.), income ranges, and a section which describes your interests, favorite hot spots and what you are in search of – a friend, companion or pursuing a long term relationship. Keep all of your information general, and remember that you are not required to answer any questions that make you feel uneasy. It is a dating site so you should include a couple of pictures. I also perused other profiles on the site for ideas.
Proceeding with caution – You receive an influx of potential matches daily. You also have the option to manually search the database which consists of hundreds or thousands of people. My first month was a little overwhelming- I was flooded with emails, winks (a show of interest) and other acknowledgements of interests such as people indicating likes on my pictures or being selected as “favorites.” The protocol for how you reciprocate depends on your level of interest. For example, winks are an ambiguous gesture of interest and not as forward as sending emails.
Someone once told me that you have to kiss a bunch of frogs before you meet your prince. That said, be patient and don’t get overly excited by the influx of attention you start to receive. If someone does not interest you, you are not obligated to respond. Most important, be smart about the information you divulge about yourself after meeting someone. Also be smart about when and where you meet people, if that is an option. Always stay within your levels of comfort, not your friend’s levels. Stay true to yourself and don’t take yourself too seriously. Have fun.
Peace and Blessings,